"The best times you are going to have in life are at the dinner table and in bed." Old Italian saying. So relax, and enjoy the simple things!

5.9.12

A Little Support is All We Really Need: Simple Living Ideas

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My son Kayaking


I watched my son 13 year old son pack up his fishing gear on the dock of our camp in the Adirondacks. He seemed to have a lot of equipment to deal with so I asked, "Can I help you with anything?" 

"Yes, hang your feet over the side of the dock and put them on the kayak." 

This wasn't what I was thinking about doing, but I obliged. As I sat there in silence steadying the boat with my feet I realized how much this simple act symbolized what we all really need from our relationships. 

We don't need someone to take over and load our gear for us. 

We don't need help getting into the boat. It's our boat, our life, we know how to navigate it... most of the time anyway. 

We just need our friends and family to now and again steady the boat for us. Support our ideas, our plans and just let us sail...
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10 comments:

  1. Out of all your posts, I think this is my new favorite. It's such a simple act, to support someone, but yet it's so hard for some people to do. Thank you for the reminder to be a support, even if I may think a different way is better.

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    1. Thank you. It is actually very freeing but so hard to do sometimes, especially as parents I think we think we need to "tell" our kids all the time what to do, instead of supporting their ideas.

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  2. My oldest is almost 13. This post resonates with me because it seems like my parenting style has had to change a bit lately. I have to let him do more for himself but still be there to support him.

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    1. I'm finding it to be a really hard transition. I am definitely now always sure about how much he needs to learn on his own. I hope I figure it out before my daughter turns 13!

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  3. This is a beautiful post, Diane, and so true! It is so hard to let our kids do things on their own, but it is the most wonderful thing we can do for them. I'm still figuring it out, and my son is now 19!

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    1. Thanks so much April... 19 sounds scary to me, not that far away. Always good to hear from you. Have a lovely weekend.

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  4. Liked the "idea" of this, Diane. And, it's so true but a never-ending struggle to "step back." My daughter is now raising her girls and is trying very hard to "let them do it and wear it and try it and be it". She's not finding it very easy. If I have to hear one more time how I made her and her sister wear preppy clothes and monogrammed sweaters (which they hated) when they were growing up, I am going to dis-inherit her. I wanted them to look perfect when they left the house - they wanted to look like they wanted to look. What seems so simple now seemed so hard then.

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    1. I'm a prepster from CT and my husband, "Richard Horrock Balch III" is a true prep school boy from Miami. He still only wears "the uniform" button down oxford shirt and chinos. Our son rebelled against this year ago. He won't were anything with buttons or pants with zippers it horrifies us both he looks like: a New Yorker!

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  5. I love this! Thank you so much for sharing it at Motivation Monday.

    Your post resonated with me in several ways. I'm dealing with a situation with one of my sils because even though she's a long-time friend, when I was struggling publicly with something, she withdrew her support. Then, I think about my own ds16 who is moving closer to manhood. I keep encouraging him wherever I can to try new things out, like the Leadership Training he went to this summer. It's not easy to be supportive at times when our own stuff comes up. It does feel wonderful to see our children succeed.

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    1. I hear you Barb, if we can release our own fear we really do feel good being supportive. I find being dominating exhausting. It's scary when you let go because you really don't know what is going to happen. So sorry to hear you didn't get support when you needed it. I lost a few friends last year because I felt so betrayed by their lack of support.

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